We all have things in our lives that we regret, wish we had done differently or wish a situation turned out differently.  If you have no regrets, good for you – move to the next post in my blog!  I have regrets, some are as a result of actions that took place over 20 years ago but the pain of some of those regrets are still very fresh.

I have been trying to move beyond my regrets because I know that in some ways they are holding me back, it is occupying space within me that could be taken up by something more joyful.  I was never quite clear on how to move past them, admittedly I didn’t try to hard to figure it out because unconsciously I believe a part of me started to feel comfortable in the pity parties that came with my regrets.

One day I got tired of the mental baggage that came with my regrets, it was an all of a sudden moment.  I woke one morning and said that it has to be more to my life besides my past mistakes, I asked myself the question – how do I get past them?  The answer for me was simple: Acknowledge It, Forgive It, and Move Past It.

Acknowledge It: For me this was looking in my bathroom mirror and saying my regrets out loud.  By saying my regrets out loud I was releasing the baggage from my mind and speaking my truth, it was no longer a hidden secret.  By speaking my regrets I was no longer allowing myself to be vulnerable to the mental drainage that came along with carrying them around.

Forgive It:  I apologized to myself for my actions and the pain that it caused me over the years; I asked God for forgiveness.

Move Past It: I immediately began to work on the thoughts running through my mind. Whenever I started to think about my regrets, I started speaking words of affirmation to myself. Words are powerful tools, especially the words we speak to ourselves, for me it can make or break my day.  I asked God to give me the strength to move past it and move on to what He has for me.

Applying these steps is daily effort, each day gets better and better.  I find that those unpleasant thoughts crept to mind mostly when I was idle, which is different then my meditation time.  I started to fill idle time with being productive which included, writing my blog, reading a book, going to see a film, trying a new dish, etc. Being productive is not always an action, it could be sitting still meditating or praying.

If you are living with regret be gentle with yourself, forgive yourself and move past it.  Find out what works for you, what brings you joy and go for it.  Life is to short to live it with regrets because those regrets are blocking you from your true destiny.